Swallowing Pride Is A Hard Pill
“Pride: the consciousness of one's own dignity : he swallowed his pride and asked for help” -Google dictionary
In last week’s blog post So I Said, "I will Crate Them!", I mentioned at the very end that asking for help is essential for success. Well, the truth is that asking for help is one of my largest, ugliest demons. It is a nasty monster with at least 3 heads, all with a different voice. One voice says, “Nobody wants to help you. You take up too much of their time.” Another head says, “You must pay lots of money to get the help you need.” The third head says, “If you ask for help, you must entertain them and make it fun for them or they won’t do it again.” The demon actually has a lot more heads than this but these are the largest ones.
It makes perfect sense that with a monster like this chasing me, it is no wonder that asking for help turns me inside out. I don’t want to ask! I don’t like to ask! I certainly don’t want to be all sweetness and light all the time while I am being helped!
Fortunately, there is a larger, louder voice that says, “Girl, you got to take this monster down! It only has the power you give it, so you have got to grab it by the throats! It’s talking trash and you have too much sense to listen to it. In order to get to where you say you want to go, you must ask ask ask! Give people the opportunity to help. They want to help. It makes them feel good. There is no dignity lost by asking.”
There is a power and freedom that comes with understanding all the voices in my head. I am certain that all of us have them and separating them all out is a huge challenge. I was fortunate to have been introduced to a therapist in my early twenties who I let into my hard shell of self protection. She helped me see myself whether I wanted to or not. I gave her permission to help me tease out the threads of my life and the tapestry became much clearer. The three headed monster still nips at my heels and sometimes it even dances around and gets up in my face. Sometimes I actually listen to it and it drags me under for a time, but I know for a fact that when I dig deep and access the courage, I can be afraid and ask anyway. Once I have asked for the help I need and I have received it, I feel powerful and grateful for the kindness of people.
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